What is Complete Biblical Forgiveness?

“Forgive and forget” this is the old saying. Many times putting this into practice is much harder. It can be difficult to truly reconcile with one whom we’ve had conflict. Many of us can just have trouble letting some things. When the hurt runs deep true forgiveness can be a real challenge. To “forgive” while refusing to reconcile with the other person is no forgiveness at all. Intentional Reconciliation

15When Joseph's brothers saw that their father was dead, they said, "What if Joseph bears a grudge against us and pays us back in full for all the wrong which we did to him!" 16So they sent a message to Joseph, saying, "Your father charged before he died, saying, 17'Thus you shall say to Joseph, "Please forgive, I beg you, the transgression of your brothers and their sin, for they did you wrong."' And now, please forgive the transgression of the servants of the God of your father." And Joseph wept when they spoke to him. 18Then his brothers also came and fell down before him and said, "Behold, we are your servants." 19But Joseph said to them, "Do not be afraid, for am I in God's place? 20"As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result, to preserve many people alive. 21"So therefore, do not be afraid; I will provide for you and your little ones." So he comforted them and spoke kindly to them. Genesis 50

This familiar passage gives us a pattern of biblical forgiveness. Joseph, hated by his brothers, sold into slavery, is placed in a position great power by God’s design. Instead of planning out his revenge, Joseph forgives and embraces his brothers. No one would have blamed him for holding a grudge, but Joseph shows how God’s love reigns in his life.

Our Number One Priority

22"But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother shall be guilty before the court; and whoever says to his brother, 'You good-for-nothing,' shall be guilty before the supreme court; and whoever says, 'You fool,' shall be guilty enough to go into the fiery hell. 23"Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering. Matthew 5.

Jesus makes it extremely clear that for believers, failure or refusal to reconcile is not an option – it is sin. Jesus teaches that is doesn’t even matter who is at fault in any disagreement; the believer is responsible to attempt to resolve the conflict. Christ goes on to say that a believer has no place at worship as long as he or she knows that there is an existing unresolved conflict with another. His instruction is that the worshiper must leave and pursue reconciliation with that person. Only after this is he or she to return to worship. This excludes the excuse of needing time or ignoring the other person. No this is direct interaction /communication with active forgiveness/reconciliation.

Complete Forgiveness God’s Way

12So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; 13(bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. 14Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. 15Let)the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful. Colossians 3

Paul explains what type of forgiveness is acceptable to God in the scripture as well as in Ephesians. When it comes to granting forgiveness, there are no exceptions. The scripture clearly teaches that believers must always be characterized by the same attitudes and characteristics that are in Christ. They must forgive those who wronged them — EXACTLY in the same manner that they had been forgiven by Christ.

In many ways, these can be hard words for us to hear. For some of us, these passages do exactly what they are intended to do — remind us of forgiveness that we have refused to grant and to remember the forgiveness we have received. We did not pursue Christ’s forgiveness – rather He pursued us! What are we to do when … we are wronged — or worse yet, someone we care about is wronged — and we get angry. We may confront the offender. We want him or her to hurt like we hurt to endure an acceptable amount of punishment. So what happens? We “hold” and often “nurse a grudge.” Every time we see, hear about or think of him or her, the anger reignites inside of us and that old wound is reopened. We are not the judge. Do not set yourself above God. He has commanded our action. He and He alone is the righter of wrongs. Allow His grace to work you through the wrong to true forgiveness. Within yourself you would be unable to do what only God can command and give us the power to obey.

If you don’t forgive then where is the “fruit of the Spirit”? — To display any other type of attitude fails to honor and glorify God. It is SIN! When we try to do it in our own flesh we will fail. The resentment we keep inside can make us physically and emotionally ill – it will affect those we love. This will only serve to separate us from fellowship with God. It impairs our ability to be led by the Holy Spirit.

God’s Word make this truth very clear- if we call ourselves followers of Christ, we have to forgive those whom we feel have done us wrong. What then if the other person refuses our attempt to make things right? That part is not up to us — we can’t force reconciliation, but be sure you have truly attempted with all of your heart and have left no doubt in the other person’s mind of your intentions.

By an act of desire to love Christ and to fulfill His commands to love one another while relying on the power of the indwelling Spirit, we must forgive as Jesus has forgiven us. This means complete forgiveness. Complete restoration of the relationship. This means a willingness to be hurt again and again. Just as Christ has done for us every time we return to Him seeking forgiveness and reconciliation. He doesn’t tell us that after we have proven ourselves and earned His trust that He will fellowship with us again. NO! It is complete forgiveness – strings attached. We are called to this level of forgiveness. This is true forgiveness - it is in an expression of grace. Only then will we understand what it means to have “peace of Christ ruling in our hearts.”

sherman